If only weddings were as simple as picking a his and hers wedding ring set that you like and being done with it. Well, technically, they could, but there’s not a whole lot of pomp and circumstance there. It’d make things easier, but there are other ways to manage wedding stress.
Navigating the seating chart is like diffusing a ticking time bomb of emotions set to the tune of an open bar. Okay, maybe that’s a little dramatic (in most cases). Still, the seating chart can be stressful and cause some tension.
The traditional head table is still the go-to, but the sweetheart table is definitely gaining traction lately. While it won’t work for everyone, a sweetheart table can be a good way to delicately steer around seating chart pandemonium.
What Is a Sweetheart Table?
Pretty much what it sounds like, unless you assumed it would be a table made entirely of candy. That’d be a Sweet Tart table. Whatever, it was funny.
A sweetheart table puts just the two of you at a table by yourselves (hence the name). While not the only alternative to a traditional head table, it is one of the more popular.
Why Not to Have a Sweetheart Table
You Want to Include Close Family Members
Not every member of your family may get a role in the wedding. This is especially true if one or both of you has large, close families. If you just don’t have enough roles to go around for all the important family members, a seat at the head table is a nice gesture.
You’re on a Bit of an Island
It is just the two of you there, after all. If you want that space, it’s great. If you’re a pair of ardent extroverts, you may feel a little bit isolated or removed from the action.
While it sounds weird to say on your wedding day, you may not want to be stared at. Yes, you’re the reason everyone is here, but still. You might just want a minute to eat without being stared at like a well-dressed zoo animal.
You Want to Be Surrounded by Your Wedding Party
This should be obvious, but it’s probably the thing you’re giving up the most when choosing a sweetheart table. You can, of course, go see them at their tables. If it’s important to you that they’re close by the entire time, a sweetheart table isn’t for you.
Why You Should Have a Sweetheart Table
If you haven’t had alone time since you added a wedding band to your cushion cut engagement ring, this is a perfect way to take a breath and be together. If you’ve had a long day or you’re both more introverted, you’re probably in need of a quick breather after everything. The sweetheart table guarantees at least some breathing room.
Feelings Are Spared (or Hurt) Equally
Look, you can’t please everyone. However, there’s no playing favorites at a sweetheart table. Is that some middle-school-sounding nonsense? Yes. Do some adults still function that way? Also yes.
If nothing else, a sweetheart table is a pragmatic solution to a seating chart problem. You don’t have to worry about who gets a seat at the head table (and who doesn’t) if you just put two chairs down and call it good.
Allows Your Bridesmaids and Groomsmen to Mingle
Obviously, they’re there for you. However, there’s a good chance they know other people at this wedding and want to go say hi. While your wedding party isn’t going to say it (hopefully), they likely don’t want to spend every second attending to you. Will they happily spend most of their time doing that? Absolutely. Let them have a break to see family and old friends.
This is probably something you haven’t thought of unless you’ve been on the other end of this. It’s a bit daunting to walk up to a long, panel interview-length table to talk to the bride or groom.
Unless you’re close and know everyone at the table, there’s definitely a barrier to entry with the traditional head table. The sweetheart table gets rid of that immediately.
On the exact opposite end, a head table sort of keeps the happy couple planted in their seats. Maybe not entirely, but it’s definitely more work to get up and see everyone. Plus, you’re sort of deserting the table when you get up and go. That’s not actually what you’re doing, but it may well feel like it.
If you want to be free to pop up and mingle at your leisure, a sweetheart table makes that much more convenient.